What does it feel like to be loved?
I wish to know
I wish to feel that
Sometimes in our lives, the lucky ones like me, we meet this person who we love beyond any describable boundaries. We love them, like we love life itself. We want them to be a part of our life, no matter what. In some way, in some form. We do not need to have a carnal relationship, we just want them to be a part of our lives. For the really lucky ones amongst us, this wish comes true.
For others, it stays a dream.
We cannot move on in our lives. We might settle down with someone completely different. We will love them as much as we can. But we know deep inside, it is not the same as being with that divine being, we found in our lifetime. We compromise and dare not tell anyone that it is true.
We hold our breath forever…
This time I was not even looking for a relationship, I was just wanting to be friends and this girl came from nowhere and said she liked what I wrote on my online profile and wanted to hang out. We hung out a couple of times and I can say I was gentlemanly as well as attentive. Her reason for not choosing to hang out more was cause I was too tall (heck, yes. I am 6’0 and she is 5’3 – guess we are ‘miles’ apart, sigh!). Since she said that she had been texting me and asking me for opinion on who to date and stuff and I was still continuing to talk.
Today is my birthday (Thank you, You do not have to comment birthday wishes now, but I feel your thoughts, so I would like to thank you :)) and she wishes me and then asks me to go to another online dating site and also told me she found someone ‘better than her ex’ today. How sweet! Guess I was a wee bit jealous, or in some kind of a ‘losing situation sadness’
I wished her the best and told her I would pray for her well being (and I did in my morning prayers today).
Just wanted to write about it here. Not that I am hurt deeply, but I should say I feel a little sad. Maybe on another day, I would not have been too bothered. But then birthdays are just overrated.
“She” (my ‘she’) was an amazing friend. I will always miss her. I pray for her well being and ‘hers’ everyday. I am happy for that.
I can swear I saw “her” in my dreams last night, but I really cannot recollect anything now. Should have been good, am sure 🙂
All you wonderful people out there – take care and God bless you…
I always love looking up at the full moon. It is a full moon day today and as always I am thinking of her and wondering what she is up to. Maybe the moon will reflect my thought beams to her. 🙂
Go out and see the moon. Bask in her glory.
To everyone who is reading this – you will have an amazingly happy and blessed month ahead. Take care and keep smiling.
Sometimes you meet someone, and it’s clear that the two of you, on some level belong together. You belong to each other, and you were meant to cross paths. As lovers, or as friends, or as something entirely different. Whatever it is, there is a purpose for the two of you meeting. You just work […]
While I have read and heard from several people that clinging on to lost love is foolish, I absolutely cannot overcome thinking about her. After all, I started off by being her friend and wanted to be her close friend always. I expressed myself at the most inopportune time and behaved with her in ways, I should not have with a friend. I miss her tremendously and all I want right now is to be her friend always.
It is this inherent wish to be loved by everyone I meet in my life, I wanted to be loved by her as well. But she mistook it for cupid/carnal love. It was neither, it was pure, unadulterated love that cannot be defined with a simple set of words.
I wish she understood that and came back to me.
I only wish for her to remember me during the best and worst (hopefully does not experience this though) of times. I want to be her trustworthy friend who she can trust at any point in time in her life.
Everyday, I am scared that if I were to die in a random accident or a shooting (which has happened more often than anybody would want in my current city in the US), she may not know that I was thinking about her all the time. Even if something happens to me, I only wish that she reads this and know that I thought about her every living moment, including my last one.
I love y0u my friend. I just want you to be happy always and loved by you as a friend always.
Am feeling light
Am I happy or
Am I empty
Guess some questions are better left unanswered 😉
I could turn invisible…
And watch her every move for the rest of my life…
No gift can be greater…
Should not have expressed myself.
Lost a great friend.
I wanted her to be a part of my life.
Now, I do not.
What did I do.
Oh, What did I do.