Firstly, I would like to thank you for showing interest in my blog and also trying to read my ‘About’ page to know who is this is crazy guy.
I am from Asia, raised with a lot of traditional, conservative values in one of the metros in my country. From a very young age, I grew up reading a lot of books and my perspective towards life and my outlook was very different from a traditional boy from back home.
I am over 30 years old and had always believed that there can be no such thing as one true love. I have believed that love is just a chemical reaction (it probably is), that messes you up enough to experience sadness and happiness at the same time. I thought you would not be able to love the same person if you see them day-in and day-out for a long period of time. I have been with a lot of friends, girls and boys, and whenever a girl got a little close to me I would think, Nah, this is not worth it. I have remained a virgin up until now, though I have had some ‘interesting’ experiences in massage places. I thought no girl was worth all the hype that people give over love. No girl, would be able to make me feel so simple about myself that I would lose all focus thinking only about her.
And then, I met her!
My world changed. Sunrises felt brighter and warmer, Nights were more romantic than ever. The air I breathed felt fuller and smelt nicer. My mirror showed me a person who seemed way more handsome than I ever was.
And then I realized she can’t be mine…
And this blog is a rant off of a love struck idiot, going through a phase of loss of love in his life. Or so you would think. No, this is much more than that. This blog is a testament to my thoughts and what I have felt so far and am feeling currently as I fight my way through this phase and try to bring myself back on to my feet. I still love her and always will. Read on and share your thoughts. I am a sucker for both appreciation and abuse. So speak your mind.
Oh, by the way, the image you see in the header, well I drew that on a hotel letter pad – this was a beach I visited with her, and there is actually a photograph with her silhouette. When I drew this, I removed her silhouette. Of course I had another hand drawn version with her as well, which I gave her.
My request to anyone who cares to listen: Love truly, at least once in your life – whether you succeed or fail, the experience teaches you realization and enlightenment like nothing else.
Important note: Do not dare to belittle her character or decisions. He is 100 times better suited for her than I am and I never really thought about approaching her ever. She was being a wonderful friend and a caring person and went out of her way to not hurt me every time she could. I can never ever hate her and I do not want anyone who reads my blog to ever think she was the one who misled me. It is just a combination of all things wrong on my side. I would rather have no “likes” or comments on this blog than anyone saying anything remotely disrespectful of her. A man is not always right, no matter how succinctly or emotionally he puts it. I can go on and on, but I hope you understand my thoughts. She is THE most perfect being I have met and I do not want anyone to think otherwise.